It was an appealing concept. The idea that women could, for the first time in history, "have it all". The husband. The kids. The house. The career. And it seemed excruciatingly fair, too. Women are, afterall, just as smart as men, so why limit them to tuna casserole?

Or so the argument went.

And lots of women signed up for it. According to a study conducted by the University of Chicago, by 1998 the number of parents who both worked outside the home reached 67%. Those that were mothers were "having it all". But now millions of new moms with today’s option of "having it all" are beginning to say, "No thanks. I don’t want it all. I want… less."

Many new moms are doing the new math.

For thousands of years being the female half of "His and Hers" was a full time job. (Ask any mom who raised a family and ran a household without a full time outside job and she’ll tell you.) And it was a darn important job, too. What desk job, spreadsheet or business presentation could be more important than raising another human being? Super-achieving moms who were so inclined also assumed important roles as leaders or volunteers in education, community matters, government, churches, or war efforts.

Dad works his full time 8 to 5 job with the commute. Mom works her full time 8 to 5 job with the commute. But while dad is resting or recreating in the evening from his 8 to 5 job, mom often gets to do her other full time job: Laundry… packing lunches… fixing something, picking up something, cleaning something, putting away something… calling in or picking up prescriptions, driving someone somewhere, shopping… going to the dry cleaner, taking care of an extended family member or any one of the millions of things one has to do to keep a household and a family together. Those things don’t just disappear because mom has another full time job. Dad might help, but more often than not, mom bears incredible responsibility for the care and well-being of the children and the household.

Plus, when mom works outside the home the safety and well-being of the children has been left to – admit it or not – almost complete strangers. Exactly how different are the hiring procedures at the day care center from your favorite fast food restaurant? Deep down, millions of moms don’t like that. They worry. They feel guilty. Often, real guilty. And scared. Scared that something will happen to her vulnerable child when she is not there. Then, since she feels guilty, that guilt often creates discipline issues as well as other problems.

Some moms are finding that "having it all" means having more pressure, more stress, more headaches, more fatigue, more guilt, more feelings of inadequacy, low self-esteem, less romance, and a general lifestyle of frantically running from crisis to crisis without ever having time to stop and smell the roses… or the cookies baking.

You can see this phenomenon in your grocery store around 5:30-6:00 pm on weekdays. See mom, dressed up in her professional clothes going through the store with her kids in the shopping basket. The kids have been little more than a number all day and they’re dying for some one on one with mom. But mom is tired and stressed out from her day job and is trying to figure out how to get the groceries without forgetting the shampoo, get dinner on the table and get everything else done before collapsing. She tries to be there emotionally for her children, and she feels guilty for failing, but the reality is that she is simply exhausted. She has already spent everything she had for the day, just like dad did.

This scene, which occurs every Monday through Friday to varying degrees affects millions of moms, and worse, millions of children, and tragically epitomizes the nature of the "new" relationship between mother and child. The new "having it all" lifestyle impacts all of us. These millions of children who are being raised by virtual strangers and overwhelmed or absent parents are this country’s future. Some suggest that we are already beginning to see the results of absentee parenting in such problems as school violence, teen drug and alcohol abuse, child runaways, the drop out rate, and the rate of teen suicide.

Lots of new moms are re-thinking their options. Many of them still want to work, but they’re opting to work… at home.

One website, Moneyfromhome.com, helps the new moms who are doing the new math by making it easier for them to find suitable home-based employment. Moneyfromhome.com researches and publishes legitimate scam-free job information, as well as helpful information about home-based businesses that can be started and run from home. The easy-to-use website currently lists more than a thousand diverse home-based job listings including home-based employment, independent contractor opportunities, and home-based business opportunities. The site even publishes information about home-based education opportunities and also offers members other perks included in their membership like limited free software and access to thousands of pages of special reports on various topics. Subscribers to the service can receive a whole year of home-based job information for about $35.00 and then use that information to find their home-based job the same way they might use their local want ads to find traditional employment.

A woman gains several quality hours each week simply by giving up the commute. Going to work at home involves a walk down the hall or a walk down the stairs, not a drive across town. Plus there are all the intangibles. She can work while her laundry is drying. She can heat up leftovers. She can still be at home working when the pest control man needs to get in, and she can afford to schedule doctor and dental visits without risking getting fired for them. She may even be able to get away with sleeping in. She can run errands and shop while everyone else is working, and she can be home working while they’re all standing in line at the grocery store or sitting in rush hour traffic.

New moms are figuring out how to run the household while being a better mom at the same time, and they’re finding they have more time for themselves in the bargain by working at home.